Friday, October 9, 2015

Someone Died - Now What?: Book Review

Someone Died - Now What? book cover.
When I was invited to read and review Someone Died - Now What?: A Personal and Professional Perspective on Coping with Grief and Loss, I thought this book may be able to help me with my own grief journey.  I was right - this book did, in fact, help me along my journey.

About the Book: In her book, Someone Died - Now What?, Corrie Sirota provides support, validation, perspective, and guidance on how to cope when someone you love has died.  She also provides information on how to support a grieving family member or friend.  Additionally, she discusses how to support grieving children, how to cope with feelings of sadness, guilt, and anger, and how to cope with non-death losses, such as the loss of a job.

My Thoughts: Corrie Sirota provides some very practical solutions on how to cope with feelings of grief as well as practical suggestions for supporting a grieving loved one.  She emphasizes just how uncomfortable grief makes many people and reminds the reader to try not to take it personally if their family and friends distance themselves from them while they grieve.

Had I not recently gone through my own loss with Jewel, I would have been skeptical about how uncomfortable grief makes people.  As someone who worked in the field of social work, I faced grieving individuals often.  However, in our society, grief is often avoided at all costs.  Most of us don't want to deal with our own grief, l;et alone watch someone we love hurt so much.  This book reminded me that friends and family members often have good intentions by trying to distract me from my sadness or by telling me to focus on the good times.

I really love that Sirota included an entire chapter in this book on how to support a grieving loved one.  Many of her practical suggestions are things I wish that more people had done or offered to do for me.  She suggests things, such as just listening to a grieving person's memories of their loved one, offering to help with everyday household chores, running errands for the grieving person, and identifying ways in which the mourner can honor the deceased loved one.

Sirota emphasizes throughout this book that grief is a process - not an event.  I believe this is such an important point for mourners as well as their loved ones to understand.  Each person grieves in his or her own way and will not necessarily grieve for the same length of time.

The author also includes a chapter on things that need to be done immediately following the death of a loved one, which I believe is especially helpful, as the loss of a loved one is incredibly overwhelming.  She lists documents that need to be collected, things that need to be cancelled, and services that need to be transferred.

This book is incredibly validating.  Sirota provides support for the mourner throughout the book while encouraging her to move forward in her own time.  She tackles the complicated feeling of guilt and provides strategies for dealing with it as well.

I highly recommend Someone Died - Now What? to anyone who has lost a loved one.  While this book focuses on the death of family or friends, I found it helpful in moving forward with regards to Jewel's loss and would recommend the book to other people who have lost a beloved animal companion.  I would also recommend this book to people who want to help a grieving loved one.

Giveaway

You can enter for a chance to win one of five copies of Someone Died - Now What? using the Rafflecopter widget on the iRead Book Tours page HERE

Corrie Sirota
About the Author: Corrie Sirota holds a Masters degree in Social Work as well as a Graduate Certificate in Loss and Bereavement from McGill University (Montreal) where she has been teaching as a lecturer in the School of Social Work for over 20 years.  Corrie is a licensed psychotherapist who currently maintains a private practice specializing in Loss and Bereavement, Parenting Issues, and Relationship Issues.  She is a well-known lecturer who regularly presents at conferences and workshops, both locally and abroad.  Working in the Montreal community for over two decades, Corrie has developed numerous prevention and intervention programs for families, children, professionals, students, and various community agencies as well as Day and Residential Camps.

Corrie has also written numerous articles and blog posts and is regularly interviewed on local radio, news, and TV programs to consult on issues relating to loss and bereavement, child development, and parenting.

Connect with the Author: You can connect with Corrie Sirota on her website, Twitter, and Facebook.

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FTC Disclosure: I received a copy of "Someone Died - Now What?: A Personal and Professional Perspective on Coping with Grief and Loss" for an honest and fair review.  Receiving the free book did not influence my opinions in any way.  All opinions expressed on Fur Everywhere are my own.  

14 comments:

  1. It is nice when something like that is really helpful!

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  2. Gweat review. Gwief is a pawrt of life as death is. Lots of peeps don't deal wiff it, so this sounds very helpful.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Lexi

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  3. Everyone deals with grief in different ways so I would think it would be hard to give advice on the subject. But that was a good review.

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    1. I agree, which is why I don't provide a "one size fits all" model. Grief is like a snowflake or finger print; no two are alike and that is precisely how I address this reality throughout the book. Thanks for raising that point.

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  4. I do think grief makes people uncomfortable. It seems to be hard for them to know what to say when really all they need do is listen.

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  5. I think the more resources the better whether grieving pets or people.

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  6. This sounds like a REALLY helpful book!

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  7. I think the more resources the better whether grieving pets or people.

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  8. This sounds like a wonderful resource. It is really hard to watch other people go through grief. I often want to help them as they heal, but find the weight of it is too much for my own sanity. Avoiding it is often the better option for my own mental health. I'm sure that is the case with a lot of other people too.

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  9. When I try to help I get to grieving with them. That can't help. No one helped me with both parents and two beloved cats. No that's not true. There were three bloggers who called very frequently and listened to me cry. Anipals help one another with grief when a loved furred family member passes.

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  10. This sounds like a great and much needed book. I also work in the helping profession, and many don't realize that professionals also have trouble facing grief in their personal lives. It's a difficult emotion to face and deal with, and many are uncomfortable consoling others. As Layla said, the more resources the better. ~Dawn~

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  11. a fellow blogger recently attended a work-life balance session paid for by er office - and the man said it takes 2 years to recover from the death of a loved one.

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  12. Sounds like a very good book - thank you for sharing! Purrs from Deb and the Zee/Zoey kitties

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  13. Good review! This book sounds like it would be really helpful for folks who are grieving.

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